The Regulation Journal

Waiting is the hardest part.

This week, I reached a major milestone in my writing journey: a literary agent requested the first 50 pages of my novel, Letters to My Imaginary Brother. What should feel like pure excitement has stirred up a complicated mix of emotions—hope, fear, pride, and anxiety all rolled into one.

On one hand, I know this is something big.Not every writer receives a request for pages. Agents are selective. They read hundreds—sometimes thousands—of queries a year. And something in my story was strong enough for this agent to say, “Send me more.”

But on the other hand, the waiting is overwhelming.I keep thinking:

Did I format everything correctly?

Will she like the opening chapters?Did I send it in the right file format?

Should I have chosen Google Drive sooner?Is 56 pages okay instead of exactly 50?

These are the kinds of questions that keep repeating themselves in my head.

Anxiety has a way of turning even good news into something stressful. It whispers worst-case scenarios and convinces you that a small mistake could ruin everything. But deep down, I know that’s not true. Agents aren’t looking for perfection. They’re looking for connection, voice, and heart.

And my novel has heart.

A lot of it.

So today, I’m trying to sit with the anxiety instead of fighting it. I’m trying to remind myself:

📌 This is a step forward.

📌 This is progress.

📌 This is proof that my story has potential.

📌And no matter what happens, I’m proud that I tried.

If she requests the full manuscript, I’ll share that moment.If she sends feedback, I’ll share that too.This journey isn’t easy, but it’s real—and I’m living it one page at a time.